The rebound

I'm on the rebound. Not from a guy, or a relationship (which I don't know that I ever have been, maybe I'm too guarded to let myself get too invested, or maybe I just haven't been in enough real relationships, I don't know), but from life. I am starting to feel a little like Sarah again. I woke up refreshed this morning, and although still tempted to roll over and bask in the twittering of the birds and fresh morning air coming through my open window, I was ready to take on the day. After pushing snooze, but only once mind you. I put on clean clothes (that looked rather hot if I say so myself thanks to a cute little giftcard someone gave me that made for some guilt free Labor Day shopping). My hair is done, makeup is fresh, and I didn't wake up with a headache. Which probably has something to do with me not having any memorable dreams last night. My memorable ones have been pretty stressful and disturbing as of late. Involving mortal danger to loved ones and myself. When I am not myself, irrational anxiety takes over. I even started reading Harry Potter again. (The last time I stopped because I was experiencing like anxiety and the Dementors were haunting my dreams).

I have been able to more or less focus at work, I didn't get sick in the shower, and I sang along to Total Eclipse of the Heart during my commute. I attended a raging dead party on Saturday. And danced my little heart out. I have realized what wonderful people there are in the world and especially in my life. I am very blessed.

I also had the best of lazy Labor Days with my dear roommates. It included not showering or really getting properly dressed, lots of reading, watching lazy movies while pretending to work, lazy shopping, lazy eating. And reading myself to sleep.

Thanks all for expressing concern and love. Sometimes we need to fall apart in order to realize all that we have. And that's the beauty in the breakdown.