Dizzy

That's what I am. Dizzy as all get out. I've been more or less sick since Friday. And so granted myself a 4 day weekend. (Wasn't the plan okay, just worked out that way). And then determined that I wouldn't miss work today, got my lazy behind out of bed at 6am, felt okay took a little shower, and then the dizziness set in again. Laid down for an hour, got myself ready for work, some breakfast as I'm pretty sure I haven't had any real protein for some 72 hours, and made my way to work.

So I'm here! Be proud. I know I am. How effective I am at work is another story, as I am having a hard time focusing on anything, and I'm dizzy.

I think it might be the after effect from Valentines day. And the creepy poetry I got from more than one strange man. It's funny how you crave that kind of attention until you get it. And you cant quite explain why, it's just because its from the wrong person. That or Elizabeth Bennett was spot on when she said that poetry "[puts] pain to it"...."I wonder who first discovered the efficacy of poetry in driving away love!''

"I have been used to consider poetry as the food of love,'' said Darcy.

"Of a fine, stout, healthy love it may. Every thing nourishes what is strong already. But if it be only a slight, thin sort of inclination, I am convinced that one good sonnet will starve it entirely away."

That Lizzy is so wise. So there you have it. While it may be a nice sort of sentiment, poetry before a love has started to bloom, is just down right creepy.

In fact, when I was but 17 years old, this guy who I had a huge crush on wrote me a song and recorded it on a tape with some of the other songs his "band" played. When I listened to the songs dedication to me, I FREAKED OUT. Don't get me wrong, it was sweet as all get out. With his voice even cracking at various points throughout the song. But yes, I completely rejected him. Mostly because I didn't know how to respond to that and was terrified of actually dating someone. In fact, that might still be the issue. Something to think on.

ps....just so you don't think me entirely hopeless......I remained friends with the voice cracking boy and we eventually kinda sorta dated for a time. Was my first kiss in fact. But he was too much of a mamas boy for me. Need someone more decisive. He eventually married a girl named Sarah who is much more take charge than myself and a photographer of all things. Interesting.