Thursday, June 05, 2008
Yesterday was pretty great. Work was productive, I felt good and energized. Positive. Went to lovely Mar's house to dine on glutenly free made clam chowder with amistades. And the sugar mama took us all to a dollar movie which I thoroughly enjoyed. Ms. Pettigrew Lives for a Day....darling. Simply darling. Got home at a more than reasonable hour excited to get a few things in order and do a little reading. But alas, as I climbed out of the car, I suddenly felt a little bit tipsy. Or at least what I would imagine it would feel like to be a little bit tipsy. Shrugged it off and then stumbled to the front door where I couldn't get my key in the door because I was so dizzy. I finally made my way inside and practically crawled up the stairs. Half hazardly tried to pull of some of my clothes and collapsed into bed as the world kept spinning around me. It was really kind of frightening. And this coming from the girl who used to pass out on a regular basis.
There is something about not feeling like you have any control. My body would not obey me and while chances were that nothing serious would happen, I was home alone and it made me feel suddenly vulnerable. I couldn't as much as get out of bed to turn off the light as I tried to rest the spinning away. So I texted a couple people who might care because at least then..... well I don't know how it made it better, but it did. We go through life working and playing and being all kinds of independent in normal things like being able to undress ourselves and eat and fun stuff like that. I cannot imagine (or perhaps can, marginally) what it would be like to not have the ability to control myself and take care of the necessities. It's a frightening feeling.
Which is why I am so grateful for those who rush over to check on me without necessarily being asked. Thank you.
Status update: Still don't know what my deal was. Feeling much better this morning but a little light headed. I think I need to eat better, manage my intake. I sometimes get lazy in my gluten freeness and neglect to eat things like protein. And make sure I get stuff like iron. Which us low pressured folks need. So perhaps I could work on that.