One of the unfortunate hazards of wedding photography is that in being single, it amounts to endless conversations regarding my singledom. Or, somehow, when they decide to throw the bouquet, I am somehow the only single girl there (how does that happen?). And they literally take away the camera and make me stand there by myself as the bouquet is thrown to who? ME. Yeah it's good times.
Don't get me wrong, I'm a good sport and all, and generally value my current status, but it is a little tiresome on occasion.
Take this past weekend for example (was shooting a pre-wedding family BBQ):
**Convo with the Grooms grandparents**
G-pa: Have you ever taken pictures in Africa?
ME: Nope, would love to though.
G-pa: Well, when we went, my son took over 2,000 pictures and what for?! Now they just sit in an album and who looks at it? Nobody....grumble grumble....
ME: Well, I would love to look at them.
G-pa: And then....we have this grandson who's giving us all this trouble....
G-pa: No, the one that's giving us all that trouble....
G-pa: Yeah, Jed....we don't know what to do with him, almost 28 and just not getting married.....(shakes his head slowly...in disgrace)
ME: chuckling....Well I'm 27 and I'm not married....
G-pa: Well, you're just lovely.
What such a response means, I dont know. Following that, I spoke to the mother of the bride before I left. She started in on what time I should be at the temple the following day. I reminded her that we had only talked about the BBQ since they had another photographer (friend of the groom who was getting paid $2000, she talked me into taking bridals for her daughter and the BBQ for some $200....I don't know what I was thinking). Her response? "Well, do you think you could come, we like your pictures so much better. "
This is all flattering, but check it: It would entail me spending the entire Saturday that I had fully planned already following them around with camera, pretending to be the cousin so the other photographer wouldn't know (the one that's getting paid) with no offer of additional payment. But, she did say she would would get me all kinds of referrals! Who would expect the same treatment I'm sure. I'm sure she meant no harm, but no can-do.
And I almost did it. Seriously took everything in me to respectfully decline. I'm pretty sure this is the first step in my becoming a successful business woman. I'm quite proud of myself, still relishing it a week later.
I got off course as usual. Forgive me. Where were we? Singleness, yes. My favorite response to my unleashing the shock that is my marital status is the "Oh, are you dating anyone?", "Well no stranger, I am not....." Well, why not?"
Okay, maybe I am more acutely aware of the rules of tact than most, but how do you positively respond to such a question? There's the, "Well, nobody likes me since I contracted this dang leprosy...." or the..." Oh, I just got out of a relationship and am heart broken"....my favorite might be "well, it would get in the way of my goal of become a bitter lonely old maid." Again. No harm intended, I just wonder if people think before opening their mouths.
It's fun really.