So I stumbled across this blog....this girl just writes down random quotes she hears and posts them. I was having a hard time muffling my laughter here at work. Here are a few good ones. I couldnt help but wonder how many of our one liners would end up in here. Maybe it's prideful, but I think we are a pretty clever family.
"I always feel thinner when I'm tan. You know how black pants are slimming? Dark colors? It's like black pants for your whole body.""Except black pants don't kill you."--Two women talking in the produce section at Whole Foods
"Wait, are there two Starbucks in the mall? I just yelled at my friend for being late, and there are two Starbucks in this mall?""Maybe she knew she was late, so she went to the other one. To trick you.""What kind of friends do you have? And where is the other Starbucks?"--A girl and a barista at (surprisingly) Starbucks.
"Not a lot of teenage girls will own up to being in the Mafia, that's true."--A woman talking on a cell phone at SFO
"Mom, I need to go to the bathroom.""Goodness, sweetie, what have I told you about TMI? I didn't need to know that, and neither did anyone else here."--A girl who looked to be about 4, and her mother, in line for checkout at Andronico's.
"We'll get going as soon as the rain lets up. *pause* Well, it sure is raining here. *pause* I'm in... *looking around* ...Memphis. I'm in Memphis?" --A man in a pilot's uniform, talking on a cell phone, at MEM
"You know how they talk about jobs keeping people off the street? Why do they always say that about guys working at the YMCA, or at the bus station? My job's keeping me off the street too, and literally."--A man in a suit and tie talking on a cell phone in the lobby of my hotel.
"I never get why they make you take Algebra 1, then Geometry, then Algebra 2. It's like they're trying to make you forget. Like when you're trying to remember a phone number and some ho starts saying '9... 72... 13... 4...' Just like that. I hate Geometry.""I hate Tammi."--Two teenage girls at the bus stop on Ashby
"I totally have the first ipod.""What are you even talking about?""Metonymy.""What? How?""Where by 'first', I mean, 'first generation.' Metonymy.""That's not Metonymy.""I said one thing meaning another.""I also do that when I lie."--A guy and a girl
"And there were actually parents livid with me for teaching their children that there was more than one way to think about women." "To think about women like Marie Curie, or...?""Marie Curie or Pam Anderson. All the same. Doesn't matter."--Two women talking in line at Caribou Coffee
"So I get home, and she's sitting at the kitchen table with a notebook, counting all the carrot sticks." "Again?"--Two women talking outside Pegasus books
"Remember Kenny?""New guy, Josh's old co-worker?""Yeah. Tonight he was leaving the office and said, 'I'm going to go home and cook these steaks.' I didn't really care, but I said, 'What steaks?' And then he says, "Didn't you see them defrosting on my desk? I bought them from this guy. He was selling them out of the back of his car in the parking lot at McDonald's.'""Ew. Ew. I don't even eat cow but ew.""So in case the next story I tell you about Kenny starts with 'So we haven't seen Kenny in a few days...' Now you know why."--A guy and a girl waiting in line for breakfast at La Note
"I don't care, it's hopeless.""At least you have hope. I'm without hope.""Um. Hope-less? Meaning also without hope?"--A guy, and a girl paying half attention to him, in line for the bathroom at Raleigh's
4 comments:
...i have to take a ham out of the freezer!!
Hahah! Those were great! You can tell this person spends a lot of time at coffee shops and airports.
Hey Sarah...how do you and your mom get that picture on your profile that posts next to your name when you make a comment. I can't figure that out...
Help!
-Britten
I love the one about the carrot sticks.
Now I keep trying to hear what people are saying to catch something interesting but it's not working. Maybe the fact that I hardly ever leave the house.....?
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